So Monday night…I was laying in bed watching Aladdin (yes the Disney movie) and I see something out of the corner of my eye…it’s that bloody hamster again. (Read my earlier post...Hamster Havoc). Seriously?! Ok, there is pretty much an entire encyclopedia set stacked on the cage so it can’t be lifted, the latch can’t come undone. SO WTF?! I get him back in to the cage.
This morning…escaped hamster again. No sign of how he got out. Is this a SUPER Hamster with powers? I am seriously setting up a video camera once I get the little Fucker back into his cage. I want to see how the F he is getting out. Is it one our kids sleep walking? Or is he just that smart?! Stay tuned...
We as mothers like to think we are perfect...which most of the time is true! lol We are multi-taskers that can handle a lot of shit! Literally. But we are human. Here are some confessions of other moms...we all have moments when we let our guard down and...well, let's be honest here ladies!
1. I signed my daughter up for guitar lessons because...the instructor was HOT!
2. I skip massive parts of my son's bedtime stories because I am just so tired...he can't read so he doesn't know...yet!
3. I needed some "Mommy Time" so I let the kids eat popcorn for supper and watch reruns of Inspector Gadget so I could read my book and poop in peace! (Moms poop too ya know!)
4. We were at a friend's house for dinner when she pulled out a bottle of wine. That's when my kid screamed "That's mommy's favorite juice!"
5. My husband thinks I am sad when he leaves again on a business trip, but I am secretly so friggin happy that my "third child" is away again!
Ever wake up at 2:00 a.m. on a nearly inflated mattress on a hard surface realizing you were drenched in urine? My daughter and I were “sharing” a bed so naturally, the pee pooled around me because I am more than twice her weight. It was cold, rainy and miserable and there was still another 4 hours till daylight. With nowhere to go, rinse off or sleep, we sat there in silence, blankets soaked, pitch black and smelling like an outhouse. The camping trip was a blast and an adventure we will never forget!
Ever go rafting and come across a herd of cattle and a massive bull smack in the middle of the river? We had just veered the bend when we noticed them maybe 20 feet ahead of us. Seriously?! WTF! I don’t know about you but slamming into a bulls’ testicles or a cows utters while rafting is not my idea of a good time. We panicked and tried grasping at anything we could along the edge so we could slow our rafts. After approximately 20 minutes they finally crossed so we could continue on. An adventure we will NEVER forget.
Does anyone else find kids these days lacking motivation and drive? Wow, unbelievable. My 13 year old daughter is expected to do the dishes daily when she gets home from school. Yes, we hand wash our dishes because using our dishwasher is as useless as tits on a bore (LOL, that was one of my grandmothers lines!). We live in the “country” therefore our well water is hard and leaves a nice white coating on all our dishes. Our dishes come out dirtier than going in. Ok, now that you know the history of our dishwasher I will carry on with how lazy kids are these days. So it’s Monday, the first day of spring break and my 13 year old is home for the day as the other 3 kids are at daycare. My daughters ONLY responsibilities for the day are to do the breakfast dishes, feed her guinea pigs and let our dog out for a pee. Personally I don’t think this is asking a lot. Back in the day (yup, I just went there) when I was her age, I already had a job at the local ice cream shop, washing dishes at the town hotel and occasional babysitting on top of my daily chores which included dishes, tidying up the kitchen, etc. So when I look at my daughter, I find it frustrating a little disheartening that all she wants to do is sleep the day away or watch T.V. Oh, I should mention that I have taken her to the doctor to check her iron, vitamin levels, etc. to be sure that there was nothing physically wrong. NOPE, all good with a thumbs up from the Doc. Ok, so back to Monday the first day of spring break. I come home from work at 5:15 p.m. and find her in her jammies still in bed watching T.V. I realize that she is on holidays which is fine but did she do anything I asked? NOPE! The kitchen was covered with crap she made at lunch along with empty wrappers, crumbs, stacked dishes etc. The dog was standing at the door with his legs crossed so I am assuming she didn’t bother to let him out for a pee. I counted to 10 and went to change out of my work clothes before I decided to talk to Kiana. After 20 minutes or so I asked Kiana to have a seat at the dining room table. Surprisingly I was calm and maintained my composure. She on the other hand was just a complete pleasure to deal with (insert eye roll and sarcasm here). It’s not a big deal mom, chill out, OMG, whatever mom…this is all I heard her mumble as I tried to express my concerns and rationale behind my disappointment. Well this went as good as jumping out of a plane WITHOUT a parachute! This conversation ended with Kiana storming to her room, shouting “FINE!” as she slammed the door. Does anyone else find it excruciatingly painful to try and reason with teenagers?! Really? This is her behavior from being asked to do a few small simple tasks? She acted as though I had demanded her to go out and milk the cows, collect the eggs and mow the acreage out back! Seriously! What the hell am I doing wrong here. I am sure as parents we would all like our children to be brought up as mature, responsible adults with values and morals. But how the “F*&K” do you do this? Is it today’s society? Is it something we as parents are doing wrong? All I know is that something needs to change if I want our kids to be successful in life. This will be a challenge!